Central Region Families Supporting Adoption
CONFERENCE

hosted by the Colorado Chapter
in DENVER, CO

June 8th & 9th

Book your plane, family vacations etc around this time! You won't want to miss this!

Speakers and Specialty Classes covering:

Bonding and Attachment

Foster Care and Foster to Adopt

Strengthening your Marriage
to provide a better home for your
child's needs associated with Adoption

Birth parent panel

Adoptee Panel

CORE training for certifications

Special Needs Adoption

Adoption, The Whole Story
telling it from the birth parent, couple and caseworkers sides

Adoption THEN and NOW
growing up an adopted child, then adopting 2 through domestic,
one through foster care, reuniting with Birth mom and Birth family members


Love and Life after Loss


Getting Involved in Your community


Birth Parent Classes


The fun stuff:
Family BBQ on Friday lunch with games and activities,
breakfast on Saturday morning,
Catered Lunch on Saturday and more!

Notes from FEB's MEETING

SO the last meeting ( FEB)...
I gave the Spiritual thought on BE NOT WEARY IN WELL DOING...

A few of these( imagine adoptive couples or birth parents and their trials) few have had their faith scorched, such as by the circumstances of wrenching or unrelieved sickness, grinding economic pressures, loss of a loved one, or deep disappointment with a spouse or friend. Adversity can increase faith or instead can cause the troubling roots of bitterness to spring up. (See Heb. 12:15.) A few have been overcome by the preoccupying cares of the world, those wearying, surface things of life. (See Matt. 13:6–7.) Emerson’s plea is surely appropriate: “Give me truths: for I am weary of the surfaces.” (“Blight,” in The Complete Writings of Ralph Waldo Emerson, New York: Wm. H. Wise & Co., 1929, p. 874.) A few are fatigued by unconfessed sins. A few tire from milling about haltingly in the “valley of decision.” (Joel 3:14; see also 1 Kgs. 18:21.) A few, foolishly focusing on something other than Jesus, the Sure and True Foundation, are drained by disappointment. (See Hel. 5:12.)

Whatever the preceding causes, any fainting in our minds brings a loss of spiritual consciousness and, with this, the inclination to charge God foolishly. (See Job 1:22.)

The urgings for us not to weary in well-doing contain prescriptions to avoid such weariness. (See Gal. 6:9; 2 Thes. 3:13; Alma 37:34.) We are to work steadily, but realistically, and only expect to reap “in due season.” (Gal. 6:9.) We are to serve while being “meek and lowly” (Alma 37:34), avoiding thereby the wearying burdens of self-pity and hypocrisy. We are to pray always so that we will not faint, so that our performance will actually be for the welfare of our souls, which is so much more than just going through the motions. (See 2 Ne. 32:5, 9; D&C 75:11; D&C 88:126.)

So, I stressed that as we grow our FSA chapters, plan or events and meetings and start to do outreach work, Let's remember WHY and that there will be adversity and to continually work steadily and FOCUS on WHO we are doing this work for... the Community, children, families, parents facing unplanned pregnancy and fellow saints! We are building relationships and friendships that will take time and trust and we should expect realistic goals and prepare to serve as best as we are able with the Lord's help- AMEN!

GOOD NEWS:

CO- Kelly announced TWO placements! Congrats to Annie and Thayne and Jim and Amie on their sweet baby girls! And the fabulous birth moms who had these tiny angels too!

Christy in the Illinois Chapter shared news that the adoption walk will be turned into a 5k and at NO COST to the chapter, they have partnered with another small org. Forever Families Foundation . AND...

They have a full calender of GIRLS night OUTS for the year AND the number of adoptive families increases monthly with many families of different faiths! HOW WONDERFUL!

Christy S. announced that she has two interest couples ready to set up chapters in EASTERN and WESTERN IOWA! WE are stoked to MEET THEM and get some training done as well!

NOELLE in MO is getting some planning underway for an AREA Conference!

now for the...

BIG NEWS

we are having a

REGIONAL FSA CONFERENCE

JUNE 8th & 9th

in DENVER , CO

more details to come on this but here's a few teasers...

Classes & leadership training/ core training/ birth parent classes and panels/ LUAU LUNCHEON /

MLB baseball game night on SAT. night in our own section!

optionals: family activities like hiking, Elitch Gardens, Denver Zoo, white water rafting etc are available as well- make a whole FAMILY TRIP of it!

------

we also talked about the adoption tax credit changes and FEB. 13th WRITE TO YOUR CONGRESSMAN DAY- in hopes to get our adoption refund back , instead of a credit!

here's more links

http://www.irs.gov/individuals/article/0,,id=231663,00.html

http://www.irs.gov/newsroom/article/0,,id=242932,00.html

http://www.irs.gov/newsroom/article/0,,id=236174,00.html

http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/i8839.pdf

http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-prior/f8839--2010.pdf

Also check this flier out! We should post it on the 13^th!

http://www.nacac.org/taxcredit/awarenessday.pdf

Get ready for so more emails coming your way in prep for the regional conference as well!

Meeting Notes

Spiritual Thought

Giving With Joy
Pleas read the above link on your time

... Great gift-giving involves three things: you feel what the other feels; you give freely; and you count sacrifice a bargain...
~Henry B. Eyring

I applied this not only to giving tangible gifts but the gift we receive through adoption! We are so blessed by our birth parents choices!

Good news: The Temple trip for Adoption in Denver went well and so did the Adoption walk in Illinois. Fabulous job ladies and families! Lots of fun events ahead.
Start marinating on what goals you have for your FSA next year! Do you want to make your presence known in new areas, new communities, include foster adoption families more, have better turn out to events, grow your committees and see your members start to grow in thier testimonies and ability to advocate and outreach? It's all up to you!

Dennis: How to Get our Message out in Church Presentations

AIM At the Existing Venues/ Meetings Adoption would already be In

Focus on What LDSFS offers overall
Be Broad in all the the programs and services
Touch upon everything LDSFS offers and
END ON YOUR ADOPTION experiences/ testimony and
?'s at the end.
Leave the Numbers to where someone can all for Services:)

He calls it ...
TOP to Bottom Outreach
Start from the top of the organizational/ leadership down to the members

Be at a Stake or Ward quarterly/monthly Board Meetings
as a representative for LDSFS ( make sure you are in touch with the office/ case workers etc. Don't go all rouge) And get materials from LDSFS before you go!
Contact your bishop or stake president in conjunction with your Adoption manager to see when these meetings are!


BP's around the Holidays

Just a reminder that Holidays are the toughest on Birth Parents! Why? B/c there are so many family and kid oriented activities and they are reminded of what they do not have/ could not have etc... and it's easy to think about the coulda' shoulda' might have beens, if they hade decided to parent instead of place.
Remember to reach out, include, invite and make your celebrations for EVERYONE mot just adoptive parents or children!

CO chapter is doing a THROWBACK CHRISTMAS Carnival for their FSA Party! They will have a potluck, karaoke, crafts and cupcake decorating as well as some other games and Photography! Something for everyone!

I mentioned that it might be cool to do a SECRET SANTA for Birth parents or expectant parents working with your AM's, or your birth parents too! Gifts don't have to be grand just heartfelt! And this is a way to introduce FSA to some of our birth parents as a place they can benefit and contribute to and from!

For any ?'s please shoot me an email! Also, we should have some more adoption stories to add to the collections. And don't forget Chapter Chairs- we need your adoption story too! I'd like to add that to the books and the blog!
~C



Hey everyone...
Look For Loss In Adoption on KBYU channel this month Brought to you by our very own Dennis Ashton
You may be able to find it on the web at kbyu.com

Birthmom Story #3

My name is Jessica I’m 24 I found out I was pregnant shortly after I turned 23. I was so scared to find out I was pregnant. I was a college dropout in the army reserve and I was working security full time making $12/hour and was barely making it. When I first found out I was pregnant I considered abortion for about two seconds. I didn’t want my family knowing I made a mistake and I screwed up. I wanted to hide my actions. After I thought about it and then remembered my values and beliefs that thought was gone as quickly as it came.

My next options were to be a single parent or place her up for adoption. I thought long and hard about what I needed to do. At this point no one knew I was pregnant. When I went to the doctor to confirm my suspicions I found out I was 12 weeks along. At this point I started reflecting on my life, my finances and where I was at that point in time. The biggest question that went through my head was, can I do this on my own. After going through all these thoughts I decided me being a single parent wasn’t the best option, but the better option would be adoption. Adoption would also give me a fresh start. So I made the choice to place my daughter up for adoption. This decision was the hardest one I have ever made.

When I officially decided to place, I started thinking about every person out there that is unable to have children of their own. Who am I to be a single parent when I know I can’t provide for the child as well as she needed without government assistance. I was not willing to have a child raised off of government assistance if I can help it. It would be selfish in my eyes to keep her just because she was “mine”.

My friend, Corrine, and I went on to Itsaboutlove.org and I found the couple who my bishop had mentioned in early conversation with me. I read their profile and realized there were already a lot of similarities between them and I. I was attracted to them and I wanted to meet them. I sent them a message. Sending them a message was the best decision I could have ever made. During my search for a couple I only met three couples before I found the one that was right. I have an open adoption with a beautiful couple. I’m glad I could place my daughter in a wonderful home. I helped start the family of a couple who is unable to have children of their own.

Even though my daughter is in another home, I know she is loved by many and she is provided for. She will have a better chance succeeding in life, than I could ever give her. I made the choice of adoption for her. I do enjoy the open adoption and all the pictures and emails I get from her new parents. I get to see my daughter grow up from a distance and visit when I am in town.

As time has gone by, the decision to place has gotten easier. I experienced a lot of good and bad days regarding the decision. With all the bad days I have had, I would still make the same decision to place her. My daughter is in a good, secure & loving home and I couldn’t ask for anymore. I received a fresh start and I can make her proud of me. I can work on an education and establish a career to the point where I’m not making $12/hour. I will always love her. Just because she isn’t with me, doesn’t mean she isn’t a part of me.

Adoptee Story- ANNIE

I was born on December 12th, 1978. I was a sweet little baby girl adopted into a wonderful loving family, which at the time only consisted of my Mom and Dad and two older brothers. Rewinding time about fifteen years, my Mom and Dad tried to have biological children for about ten years before considering the option of adoption. My mom was physically unable to conceive. My Mother tells me stories of sitting in the doctor’s office Waiting Room, waiting to receive her next fertility treatment (that I’m sure was the cutting edge of technology for the time considering this was before in-vitro fertilization existed), surrounded by pregnant women complaining that they were pregnant again. She wanted children more than anything. They adopted my two older brothers and five years later I joined my forever family. Ten months later my youngest brother joined our family as the caboose. I was given endless opportunities to grow up and succeed in a loving and nurturing environment. My father always provided our family with what we needed and more. He exemplified hard work and always maintained a close positive relationship with everyone in our family. He was the most exciting person to be around as he was always planning or doing something fun. He was larger than life! My Mother was fortunate enough to be a stay-at-home mom and devote her entire self to being a loving and involved mother. She was always there! My friends always wanted to be at our home and said my Mom was the "Real Betty Crocker”. I graduated from college with a Bachelor degree in Business. I have been married to my best friend and soul mate of 14 years. We have three beautiful children that I am a fortunate enough to be a full-time stay-at-home super mom to. I am considering adopting a child to add to our family. We have the option of having more biological children but I would love to adopt a child into our family to give back what I feel I have been so blessed with; the knowledge, experience and love of adoption. I am also a Doula, Childbirth Educator, and Lactation Consultant. I am very passionate about biological parenting and adoption parenting. I feel so blessed that my birth mother loved me so much that she knew she couldn’t provide me with all that life has to offer and she knew that there was a family out there that could. I truly feel that I was born into the family I was meant to be a part of. I was just delivered in a different way. I’m so grateful to my birth parents for giving me life and to my Mom and Dad for being my parents.

Annie C.

Birthmom story # 2

My Experience as a Birthmom at 16 and now a MOM of 3!

This is a real story about one of my friends... YOU MAY USE THIS FOR YOUR OBGYN Story BOOKS!

I was 16 and pregnant! To say that I was overwhelmed would be such an understatement. As soon as I found out I was pregnant a million questions started racing through my mind. Am I going to marry my boyfriend? Will I be a single parent? What about adoption?

I really loved my boyfriend, but I wasn't sure if I was ready to get married. As my pregnancy progressed I found myself focusing less on our relationship and more on what would be best for the baby. There was so much to focus on that our relationship got lost in the middle. Adoption was something that I was at least considering from the beginning, but I still wasn't sure about placing her for adoption. She wasn't even born yet, but I already loved her so much. I wanted to be there for her. During my pregnancy my mom and I took a trip out to California to visit with my Dad's birth mom. I didn't make my decision on that trip, but it definitely set things in motion. It was so nice to visit with her and hear of her experience. She talked about how much she loved my Dad and how she waited and waited for the day that they would someday meet (34 years!).
A little while later I had decided on placing my baby for adoption. I met with an adoption agency and immediately started going through their files. I prayed and prayed that God would help me find the right family for my baby. I finally found the family I knew was right and we arranged to meet through my social worker. It was so amazing. We had so many things in common with each other and it felt so relaxed and natural talking with them. About a month later she was finally born! Her family was with us in the hospital and everyone was so excited to finally meet her. In the state of Nevada, there is a 72 hr waiting period after a baby is born until it can be placed for adoption. So during that time I took her home and never put her down. I cuddled her, sang the lullabies I listened to while I was pregnant with her and took a million pictures. She was absolutely perfect.

On adoption day we met with her family again at the social worker's office. That was the hardest day of my life. To walk in with a baby and leave with empty arms. I was at peace though, knowing that without a doubt, I had made the right decision. I have an open adoption with her family and I can't imagine it any other way. The day after I placed her we got together and had lunch. Then a few weeks later they called and had arranged a flight for me to come and visit. I could hardly contain my excitement.

Now that she is older, she knows I'm her birth-mom and has asked me "Remember when I popped out of your tummy?!" She has an older sister who was also adopted that reminds her "It doesn't matter who's tummy you grew in, we're a family now!" Since day one they have been so amazing and completely selfless. I feel so lucky to have such a great relationship with them.

That all happened 6 years ago this June! A year after the birth, I met up with the birth-father again. We started talking again right away and over time we began a relationship again- something I never thought would happen. Now that we were in different circumstances, our relationship grew and grew. We got married about a year after reuniting and now have 2 beautiful girls & one son of our own.

My experience with adoption is something that has changed my life forever- in a good way! It was hard in the beginning of my pregnancy to make a decision that was so daunting, but I could have never imagined that it would turn out in such a perfect way. I still have such a feeling of peace and happiness knowing that I made the decision that God was leading me to make.

Getting ready

... for OB GYN / CLINIC BOOKS

Start submitting your adoption stories now- email me at corrine.ccbabyinc@gmail.com

1 page and 1-2 pictures please. Especially in need of birth parent stories!
~CC